El Topo

notes

WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WATCH

Every once in a while, I see something and go “FUCK! that person is a natural artist!”

This happens most when I notice the lack of a self-censoring judgement cloud. While I am a proficient technical artist, I am horrible at allowing myself to follow my true instincts. I let “making pretty art” get in the way of “making good art.” In nearly every creative pursuit I can think of: visual, writing, dancing, etc.

So, i find so much inspiration when I see someone who makes weird shit, who trusts their instincts. And god did i find this movie inspiring.

I want to go make some weird shit.

It also made me think about how adaptible children are. You can put them in the weirdest fucking environment, and they’ll think it’s normal .

One’s childhood can’t exactly be surreal, since it’s all they know.

It made me think about all the ways my childhood was crazy, in comparison to all my friends—5 time burner by 11, crazy poly parents, skipping school to help run rallies at 12, top Bernie Sanders phone banker in the country at 9, support within independence (!!)—and, in extension, how batshit all my friends’ childhoods have been in comparison to a few centuries ago, how much we have :)

We could lose it all, or gain more than is imaginable. What crazy life might my children have? How beautiful a world could I give them?

I don’t know, but it makes me feel so openhearted, grateful, excited.

If you like surrealist dreamscapes, i recommend this movie.